He moved with the confident gait of a man on a mission. Every morning, at 5 am sharp, we could see the dark figure wandering the house with his usual determined stride.
The kids did not have to see the shape to know what was coming next. The slam of the back door would sound, and they all sighed a breath of relief, not out of fear or pain but of knowing that today would be a good day. Dad was leaving to provide for them, and it felt good.
There were a couple of hours before Mom called for breakfast. During that brief period, the four kids would drift back off to sleep, enjoying the most pleasant dreams of the entire night.
It is funny how we recall simple memories once we grow up and face a complex and confusing world. But those glimpses inside our self-consciousness remind us that our dads played a key role in our lives as we grew up. While moms were responsible for running the house and raising children daily, dads worked hard to create a future for their offspring. Setting boundaries, creating stability, and teaching us to take chances and explore were traits I remember when I think of a great dad.
My father was a grain farmer, a truck driver, a school bus driver, and a diesel mechanic. Although he had too much on his plate, he also volunteered in the community and church and helped any neighbor who asked.
During the summer months, we would take off and explore the world. A camper on the back of our old pickup truck served as home as we saw America first-hand. The Cumberland Falls, the ocean in Florida, the Indian Reservations in New Mexico, and the Grand Canyon were the spots I remember. Because we were not wealthy, Dad would take jobs picking fruit or working as a farm hand while we enjoyed all the exciting new scenery and people.
When home, routine became the norm, and Sundays were ours with Mom and Dad. First came morning church, then dinner. What happened next was always a surprise. Sometimes we would drive to the airport to watch the planes take off and land, or stop by friends’ houses to catch up on the latest news.
I look around at today’s society and feel out of place. Men are softer and more vulnerable than they were 50 years ago. Let us make everyone happy, share the child-rearing equally, and discuss various punishment options with outside counsel before taking a stand.
My dad was not around as much as expected by today’s standards. But he was there when it mattered. We learned to respect his role as the head of the household and cherished the time he had for us because we trusted him. This taught me to set priorities for myself and never turn away someone in need.
If this sounds like a Walton TV show, rest assured. There were hardships along the way. However, as you get older, those moments fade against the bigger lessons learned. Now and again, a picture flashes in my subconscious of a memory long forgotten. I savor these moments and wish my dad were still here.
Happy Father’s Day Dad.
By Kate Eglan-Garton